Friday, May 1, 2009

Withering Highs

'Wuthering Heights' in today's newspaper caught my eye. I loved the classic by Bronte. Since I am more or less idle now days,I made up my mind to write on a related topic. From there,this phrase 'Withering Highs' hit me.

The word 'High' reminds me of alcohol and drugs. I am not really sure of the feeling associated with 'being on a high' but I'll try my best to pen down that sensation:P With the first sip,you revel in the taste (or turn up your nose in disgust if you are a first timer) of your drink. A sense of relaxation is evoked as you take in more sips. All your inhibitions start melting away. You start talking more and your laugh sounds heartier than before. Though you yourself are not conscious of these changes. Couple of sips later(again that varies from person to person), this blissful and ecstatic feeling amplifies. You are the happiest person and the entire world is in your feet(reverse 'Devdas' effect is also a possibility, I won't delve into that).Wow! Isn't that a great feeling! But,as all good things should come to an end, this feeling too passes away. As the clock ticks away, the high starts withering. The cursing hangover brings about the confession 'I shouldn't have overdone it'.

Coming over to my kind of 'High'. Sucking up sweetened syrup from ice crystals of 'Gola' gives me immense pleasure. The way it chills your head, I believe nothing in this world can beat it. To sum up the feeling, 'Chubbti garmi vich thand pe jaandi ha'. As the 'Cool High' starts withering, it brings with it a lumpy feeling in my throat. And that's the reason my mum (actually, its the case with mostly all the mothers) has never approved this summer delicacy.

The thick, creamy ,sweetened Lassi topped up with Malai on a hot afternoon transports you into a trance. Deep and uninterrupted sleep is the aftereffect of this drink.

The word 'High' also implies 'morally good'. This angle gives 'Withering Highs' a different meaning altogether. I am sure most of you have witnessed or have been victims of the deteriorating morals in our society. The money starved and sex starved people can stoop down to unimaginable levels. But not all is murky. There are still good people out there. They retain your faith in humanity and somewhat ease your survival in this jungle.
As they say this is 'Kalyug' and the worst is yet to be seen.

"Simply sit back and wait for the tide to turn"

I don't know why I find myself drawn to writing dark and gloomy stuff on this page. There are lots of topics waiting in the corner but when I sit down to write I just can't resist the urge to express the obscure side of me. May be its because this is the only place where I can articulate these kind of thoughts. You can easily share your happiness with others but when it comes to something gloomy then perhaps solitude is your best friend. In the shade of solitude you can contemplate and console your self from the harsh realities.

Living life is like savoring a bunch of black grapes. All the grapes look alike and you can't really differentiate between overripe,soft and the normal ones(though the overripe seeds are perfect for wine and raisins). The only way to do that is to pop one in your mouth and either relish the juicy,tender seed or chew the other one in disgust. Lucky ones are blessed with mostly juicy and succulent grapes in their bunch. Some get a balanced deal and the remaining ones get to savor mostly the overripe ones and that's my point. I think life is a bit unfair for few chosen ones and these are generally those people who always mean well and do good unto others(my perception). People attribute this to either unfavorable planetary positions or the baggage of past life Karma. You can't help but question why it had to be him/her. I wonder why we are made to suffer for our past life deeds in the current incarnation. I think all the accounts should be cleared in the current birth and no liabilities are to be carried forward. But as they say 'You cannot have your cake it and eat it too'. There must be something positive behind this “Past life Karma” theory.

Just imagine, your life is sailing smoothly and nothing is amiss. You are well settled and content with everything. Then out of the blue a speed breaker appears out of no where on the highway of life and your vehicle goes out of control. You cry your lungs out and wail in disbelief and question the supreme power 'why it had to be me'.Then gradually you retain your composure and optimism. You acknowledge your fate and concede the fact that you are not the only one with sorrows and griefs in this world. There are others with similar or worst grievances. You pray with all your conviction and your optimistic self tells you that nothing worse can happen after this. Then life bowls another Googly and leaves you dumbfounded. You feel betrayed and start analyzing your past and think of all the good things you have done for others. Hoping against hope you continue your journey on the path of prayer with renewed faith.
Desperate for a flicker of light in the plunging darkness you continue treading the path of hardships.
A prisoner of fate, you can only wait, hope and watch.

I really don't know how to conclude this.I take a walk in the dark.A dog's bark breaks through the silent ambiance.He goes on and on with his pleads but no one really cares and pays attention unless they are disturbed. Such is the level of apathy these days.
I lay beneath the starry skies and gaze at the luminous crescent shaped moon. The magnanimity of nature has a soothing effect. I am awed by the brilliance and beauty of the night sky. All the thoughts simply fade away. The twinkling stars convey a subtle message “Simply sit back and wait for the tide to turn”.And hopefully it will turn in our favor this time.